Can't get a date? Call girls take credit.

Yes folks, we said it. Don't act surprised.


Ads & Posts that didn't make the cut from 2020

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In this day and age, lot's of people get offended easily. Luckily for us, we exercise our right to offend quite often.

Narcs, the world has become a bunch of narcs sucking the fun out of funny shit. Bastards.

Tried to use something like this long ago. Still isn't allowed.

Take it off! Take it all off!!!!

We didn't even try to run this one.

It would get flagged. No shit.

Old school guys use Zig-Zag, just sayin'.

This one we designed for in-house fun.

We use cats in our ads because we love cats. Sneaky, funny fuckers that they are and are likely to remain.

Ads & Posts that didn't make the cut from 2017-2019

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Narcs. I tell ya' we're surrounded by narcs.

This one got rejected so fast we hardly had time to react. Apparently any time we try to go tame it doesn't work. The model is happy, just look at her! Actually, we are all a bit happier having looked...

Rejected by the censors because it does not contribute to a pleasant experience?

What the hell?!

While we stand behind our pledge that all our vulgarity is wholly tuitous and intrinsic to our advocacy, this post actually got rejected. What the fuck?! Come on now. It isn't like it's a lie or anything. We feel very strong for those who pay more and get less. Anyway, let's be honest here. Someone would have ratted it out had it gotten through. We're surrounded by narcs.

We try to play it bland and still can't catch a break sometimes.

A bad trip? The censors didn't like it. Apparently tripping with the whole Amanita shroom is enough to offend some candy ass somewhere, so we couldn't use this to explain the trippy type of website we offer.

Rejected by Google. Say What??!

The bots that crawl all posts on Google rejected this fine informative post. Heavens to Betsy! Technically we knew it would happen, but considering the crazy shit they ALLOW us to run, this isn't so bad. So we put it here for posterity. Enjoy.

A Chick in a g-string holding an hourglass... in Europe they'd call this art.

Another rejected post. Come on now. This one isn't even that bad. Still, the auto censors wouldn't have it. So naturally we wanted it included.

This one could be sort of read wrong...

I like cats. I like dogs. I like animals in general. It stands to reason that sometimes animals get angry. I don't get it. Anyway, rejected by the censors. Does it have anything to do with Credit Repair? probably not verging on no way in hell. Again, so what?

Again our artistic vision was impeaded by the censors. Again we ask "why?", to no avail.

It isn't a pièce de résistance, but then what is?

Dov Charney got a raw deal. We actually make him look like a Vienna choirboy

Dov Charney, the founder and genius that created American Apparel was accused of running slightly pornographic ads and other gratuitous uses of sexuality in his campaigns. Nonsense and poppycock! Balderdash we say. We make the man look like a choirboy. We proudly stand behind what we say, and all our vulgarity is wholly tuitous and never gratuitous.

This one went a bit too far. After all, "bargains" you pick up on corners are usually paid with cash.

Someone objected to this post, still it is relevant. You don't have to melt a credit card on us and you never get a half and half. So there.

This is actually tame, and it actually got rejected...

Alright let me make sure I understand this.

Aliens, pigs in heat, whips & chains, strippers, call girls, copious amounts of marijuana, drag queens, gold diggers, a guy chocking a chicken, garters, porn models, stacks of hundreds, a cock ring, tarot cards, a donkey, assorted pigs, assorted farm animals, President Donald Trump taking no prisoners, a voodoo doll, a bunch of dancing priests, a running sausage on fire, a dominatrix and over 1,000 references to madness and mayhem is fine, but two people kissing is bad. Got it.

Again, rejected. What a crock of shit.

Some people are way too uptight. Some narc ratted this one out.

This one wasn't let in either. Makes no sense to us why it would be deemed "unpleasant" to some viewers.

Florida: Wicked sun, gators and plenty of bloodsucking mosquitos.

We thought it would be cute to run a non-profane post. I guess we were wrong.

Buddy Bunny... not a hit with the censors

Our attempt to integrate cartoons into the advertising of the company hasn't fared too well. Here we have our bunny friend, helpfully letting all know how to avoid the bullshit. No dice, says the censors.

We didn't even try to run this one.

Why bother?

Sigh... brilliance is either an act of inspiration or an act of imagination. With us, it just comes natural. Wanted to run it and didn't even try. What would be the point of getting it flagged? Here it is. And yeah, yeah, yeah, now you look!

Free vision test!

This idea came to me while I was at the optometrist and I had to read the chart. Admittedly it isn't to scale with an actual chart, but I still think it works. Late 2017

What the foca?!

For those of you who don't speak Spanish, a foca is a seal. It just sounds very familiar to a, well, you know. anyway, this little push makes a nice statement without going overboard. I mean we go overboard anyway, but this was a nice touch.

Vox Populi, Vox Dei... mother#@$%&*s.

Unconventional, us? Nah.